War

JERUSALEM ­ – In tribute to the six million victims of the Nazi genocide of European Jewry, Israel’s government announced today that five more Stars of David would be added to its national flag. Speaking at an event commemorating Yom HaShaoh – Israel’s official Holocaust Remembrance Day – Israeli Culture Minister Miri Regev said: “This way, no one will ever forget that...

For the second year in a row, ISIS leader Abu-Bakr Baghdadi took aim, figuratively, at his rivals, his allies, and the media in the second annual Caliphate Correspondents Dinner, putting aside jihad for a night of jokes. “This is the one time a year I try not to bomb,” Baghdadi quipped, earning laughs from foreign leaders and media members in...

“Every organization of any kind usually has more than one,” said IDF commander Daniel Shimshon earlier today, speaking about dicks. “Now, we definitely know that we have at least one.”  These comments came on the heel of an event that, much like a high schooler’s poetry about the pain of being dumped after just six months (please come back, Stephanie!), was...

The Islamic State terrorist group was sent fleeing Sunday when, after seven years of refusing to do so, President Barack Obama used the words “radical Islamic terrorism.” Speaking from the East Room in the White House, President Obama gave the shortest address of his time in office – after finally uttering the three-word phrase, Obama left the podium. His address...

Gaza’s prime minister announced today that six attack tunnels leading into Israel had been demolished, claiming they were “dens of homo-Zionist depravity.” Speaking on Al Aqsa TV, Prime Minister Ismail Haniyeh alleged that hundreds of Gazan and Israeli men had been meeting regularly in the tunnels to engage “in acts of bestial proportions,” and that even though the destroyed tunnels degraded...

Citing the collapse of Syria and Iraq, Democratic Senator and presidential candidate Bernie Sanders vowed to break up the “too big to fail” countries if elected president. “Look, we see in the Middle East that when these big countries fail, it’s the rest of the global system that is forced to bail them out,” Sanders said in a meeting with...

Republican Presidential candidate Donald Trump called on President Obama to use torture against the terrorists who attacked an airport and subway in Brussels Tuesday, saying the use of torture against terror suspects dead or alive was the only way to prevent future attacks. “These jihadis would never blow themselves up in the first place if they knew they’d be tortured...

History.  Religion.  Who makes better hummus.  These are just a few of the points disagreed upon by Israelis and Palestinians.  Like a Jaden Smith tweet that makes any sense, one could spend years combing through layers of nonsense for things Israelis and Palestinians agree on.  But, it seems that the world has just become aware of another one of these...