Gaza’s prime minister announced today that six attack tunnels leading into Israel had been demolished, claiming they were “dens of homo-Zionist depravity.”
Speaking on Al Aqsa TV, Prime Minister Ismail Haniyeh alleged that hundreds of Gazan and Israeli men had been meeting regularly in the tunnels to engage “in acts of bestial proportions,” and that even though the destroyed tunnels degraded his forces’ military capabilities, “our hatred of Sodomites supersedes our desire to slaughter Jews.”
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Hamas’ news channel then aired footage of a tunnel strewn with used condoms and assorted BDSM equipment, including whips, gags, bondage beds and human pony harnesses.
According to Al Aqsa TV, the network of sex parties was exposed after the residents of multiple Palestinian border towns complained of repeatedly being woken in the middle of the night by the sound of moaning, as well as ground tremors.
And while Al Aqsa TV did not provide evidence of Israeli participation, Bentzion Zayin-Anak of the Brotherhood of Binational BDSM Lovers appeared to substantiate Hamas’ claims, telling Israel’s Channel 3 News: “We will simply find alternative venues; aside from the pleasure we derive from such encounters, they’re crucial to laying the groundwork for peace and reconciliation between Israelis and Palestinians. Our message is this: swap guns for gag balls, knives for nipple clamps, and barrages of rockets with showers of liquid gold…”