UN Condemns Israeli Farmers for Damaging Gaza Fire Kites

The United Nations General Assembly issued a resolution Monday condemning Israeli farmers for damaging Palestinian flaming kites, which Gazans have been sending over the border into southern Israel, causing millions of dollars in damages to Israel’s agricultural economy. According to the United Nations, the kites are often damaged upon impact before the Israeli fields burst into flames.

“In a typical case of disproportionate Israeli aggression, Israeli farmers are now using their gigantic fields of various agricultural products to destroy significantly smaller Palestinian kites which float their way. These Zionist farmers have the audacity to cultivate fields creating a hard landing ground for these kites, thus causing unspeakable harm to Palestinian property”, the resolution states. “Such damage not only leads to a significant financial cost for Palestinian kite owners and makers, but also emotional trauma and widespread concern amongst both the kite owning and non-kite owning population of Gaza.”

Israel, in response, has suggested the Palestinians “simply stop sending flaming kites over and then there could be peace”. The UN resolution’s backers, however, said such an idea was “laughable and entirely unrealistic”, stressing that “it is the farms that are the real barrier to peace here.”