Jewish Uncle Shocked to Discover That Not Everything Innovative Comes from Israel

The Mideast Beast

Uncle Morty was shocked to discover yesterday that countries other than Israel are responsible for recent technological advances. Uncle Morty, who is well known in the family for espousing common quips about Israel such as, “Israel created Instant Messaging” and “Israel has more Nobel Prizes per Capita than the US” is now trying to cope with his new understanding of the world.

“He hasn’t taken the news very well,” commented Aunt Ruth. “He’s spent an hour crying outside on the porch swing with Buster, Googling where products were invented, but he stopped when he found out Google came out of Stanford and not Israel’s prestigious Technion. When he discovered that Elon Musk was from Pretoria and not Tel Aviv, he went into a catatonic state for a few hours.”

Uncle Morty finally accepted the fact when family members staged an intervention to confront his incessant Facebook posting and email chain forwarding about Israeli inventions and creativity. The final straw came when he forwarded an email entitled “Israel Does It Again!” which contained a video of Chinese engineers describing a new type of drone they recently invented.

The episode has led Uncle Morty to question other aspects of his life, including wondering if he’ll ever get the millions promised to him by a Nigerian prince who just needed Morty’s social security number to transfer money into his bank account.

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