Biden Invites UN Experts to Assess American Falafel

Image credit: FamousDC, 27 July 2016 (Biden eating WHITE bread)

In yet another controversial move that critics say undermines the country’s sovereignty, US President Joe Biden, for a second time this week, has invited the United Nations to bring experts into the country to assess “falafel injustice.”

Despite objections from Republicans, UN culinary expects will visit the country to examine the quality of America’s chickpea-based offerings and to ensure that “crimes against the palate” were not taking place.

“I urge all UN member states to join the United States in this effort, and confront the scourge of dry, flavorless and over-seasoned falafel balls,” Secretary of State Antony Blinken said in a statement. “Because when all people – regardless of their race or ethnicity – feel confident that their falafel is not so tasteless that it constitutes a war crime, our collective security is strengthened.”

Republicans called the investigation “a sad joke,” noting that the UN had much more pressing issues that it should be devoting its time to.

“I cannot believe we are wasting our taxpayer money investigating our falafel given all the tragic events taking place across the globe,” Senator Marco Rubio (R-Fla.) said in a tweet. “For example, in Egypt, they don’t even make falafel with chickpeas – they use fava beans! And in Belgium, they serve falafel with mayonnaise! The UN should consider bringing these countries before The Hague. So what if our falafel is a little dry and we eat it on white bread?”

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