Cuming to Skies Near You: Air Aviv to Offer Clothing-Optional “Adults-Only” Class

TEL AVIV – For the first time in aviation history, Tel Aviv-based carrier Air Aviv will offer a restricted, clothing-optional “Adults-Only Class” on selected trans-Mediterranean routes.

The separate section – to be located at the rear of each aircraft – will offer five rows of business class-quality seats, each with widescreen flat screen with over 10,000 free adult films, retractable privacy shutters, complimentary lubricant, hand towel and one disposable sex toy per passenger.

Exclusive double and triple pods will also be available, and an inflight “Sky Spa” will offer an assortment of massage and beauty therapies.

“With our adults-only class, we are taking the pleasure of flying to a new level,” said Air Aviv CEO Dana Dagdagani. “Just wait till we launch entire adults-only flights to selected destinations – themed, chartered and perfect for bachelor or bachelorette parties, Gay Pride convoys and groups of kinky Arabian princes.”

Air Aviv, branded as “The World’s Sexiest Airline,” flies to over 40 destinations across Europe, Asia, Africa and the Americas. The airline is known for its risqué marketing campaigns, rainbow plane liveries, scantily clad flight attendants, top-notch vegan cuisine and delectable in-flight hash brownies.

Following Dagdagani’s announcement, Air Aviv’s local rival, El Al, issued a scathing statement: “Unlike our perverted competitor, we will continue to uphold the timeless values of the Jewish state, including bending over backwards to accommodate the gender-segregationist needs of our ultra-Orthodox passengers.”

Air Aviv, cuming to skies near you.