Trump Allows Jews to Resume Eating Bread After Passover

By U.S. Embassy Tel Aviv - President Trump at the Israel Museum. Jerusalem May 23, 2017 President Trump at the Israel Museum. Jerusalem May 23, 2017, Public Domain, https://commons.wikimedia.org/w/index.php?curid=59276644

In a series of early morning tweets, President Donald Trump gave Jews permission to eat bread post-Passover. The announcement came days after he gave American governors the authority to decide when to open up their states.

“I hope you go eat bagels, your people make some great bagels, and charge very nicely for it. Always know how to charge a lot. I respect that,” Trump said, after giving Jews permission to resume eating bread. Experts have pointed out that in the U.S. Jews do not need the president’s approval to eat bagels. Sources close to the administration have said that the President plans on continuing his new policy of giving permission to entities and individuals who do not need his total authority permission.

For example, the sources said that Trump plans to make an announcement that he will allow Arabs to eat hummus. “I don’t really like it. Not for me. I prefer burrito bowls. But, sure, I will allow A-rabs to eat hummus. I mean, really, they come to this country, they should try eating something more American. Who doesn’t love a bacon cheeseburger? Trump reportedly said in a closed-door meeting. Supposedly, the president also plans on allowing the rapper Cardi B to post on social media.

Constitutional scholars uniformly agree that neither Jews, Arabs, governors, nor Cardi-B need the president’s permission to re-open their states, break bread, eat hummus, or post to Instagram. Yet, some have opted to thank the president anyways. In a video posted to his Facebook Page, Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu said, “This president is a dear friend to Israel and the Jewish people. Because of my outstanding relationship with him, Jews around the world can stop eating Matzah now and enjoy leavened bread.”