In a ground-breaking first for medical science, the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia and COVID-19, the disease caused by the newest respiratory virus, have agreed to share responsibility for the devastation of Yemen.
A spokesman for the Kingdom commented, “We’ve been at this for five years, and to be frank it’s not exactly been ‘Mission Accomplished’. It appears that a campaign of precision bombing critical infrastructure is challenging when ‘two camels fucking’ is about the most ‘critical’ thing you can find in the desert. And that’s why this ‘world first’ alliance is so exciting. Because it turns out if someone has turned all of a country’s hospitals into piles of rubble, that’s just the ideal environment for a virulent disease to spread unchecked. Who knew?”
COVID-19 expanded, “I am just so excited that this new arrangement is going to allow me to really expand to a region where ‘war’ has been for far too long the dominant horseman. But no more! Trust me, by the end of the year no one will even remember Assad’s attempts to hinder people’s breathing. Amateur.”