As part of continual efforts to improve Israel’s image in the eyes of the world, Benjamin “Bibi” Netanyahu’s political aides have advised him to dress Israel up as a democracy this Halloween. After deliberating the matter for a couple of days, Bibi finally decided that throwing together a mock constitution and acting like less of a fascist dick-tator for an evening would indeed be a cool costume for this Tuesday.
Rumors from within the Israeli Parliament say that when Netanyahu invited his aides to email him their costume suggestions, his top choice was originally “sexy [insert occupation here]”. In a recorded phone call with the aide who submitted the idea, the PM was asked: “Which will it be, then? Israel the sexy nurse? Israel the sexy receptionist? Maybe…Israel the sexy seminary girl?”
Netanyahu made some flustered coughing sounds and then responded: “Oh. Umm, wait, sorry. I didn’t understand that that’s what you meant by ‘occupation’. Never mind. Maybe we should go with ‘democracy’ instead.”