The European Union (EU) has decided to label Jesus an “illegal Jewish settlement product from the Israeli-occupied West Bank.” The dramatic decision comes after the European Court of Justice ruled earlier that EU countries must label all Jewish settlements goods.
EU’s Foreign Policy Chief Josep Borrell spoke to The Mideast Beast from his Brussels office. “As the world’s leading human rights power, the European Union has a moral duty to oppose illegal Jewish settlement products from the Israeli-occupied West Bank. As a consequence of this policy, the EU has decided to label Jesus an illegal Jewish settlement product. We have a responsibility to provide product provenance so that consumers can make informed choices whenever they purchase or donate.”
The BDS, the Boycott, Divestment, and Sanctions movement, welcomed the European Union’s decision and added Jesus to its growing anti-Jewish products boycott list, which currently includes Facebook, Google, the Disk-on-Key, instant messaging, Waze, Viber, the mobile phone, Albert Einstein and Wonder Woman.
Borrell, who recently signed a new business deal in Tehran, stressed the EU’s importance in global politics. “In a world dominated by President Trump’s provocative military adventures, the European Union’s soft power policy supports peaceful financial pressure on all rogue regimes, except Iran.”
Borrell concluded the interview with a plea to The Mideast Beast’s readers. “Jesus Christ consumers worldwide must know that he was illegally conceived in a Zionist stable outpost outside the Jewish settlement of Bethlehem on occupied land. Violators of the EU’s new settlement product label policy will be crucified to the full extent of the law.”