US Government Issues ‘Israel Travel Warning’ to American Jews

The US State Department Monday urged its citizens to avoid all travel to Israel because of security concerns raised by Birthright trips.

In a statement, the State Department said, “American Jewish parents should understand that they accept the risks of sending their children on Birthright Israel and should carefully consider those risks.”

“In the past year, seventeen US citizens were arrested for illegal use of narcotics, 12 were hospitalized after getting crunked and four were impregnated by Israeli soldiers on reprieve from the army,” according to information available to the Israeli government,” the statement said.

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The State Department said that the Israeli government “cannot guarantee protection for US citizens or visitors to the country since getting high, wasted or laid occurs suddenly, like a welcome summer rain.”

Shoshanna Schimmel, Birthright Israel Foundation’s Senior Vice President of International Outreach, strongly criticized the State Department warning.

“I’ve taken part in many orgies with medics, tour guides and soldiers who have been involved with Birthright groups. I personally inspect each condom before use and have repeatedly recommended to female Birthright participants to follow my example. Regarding drugs and alcohol on our trips, we are developing a ‘How to Party without Getting Caught’ day. Our aim is to deny the Israeli government any more access to our naughty little secrets.”