“Screw Israel,” Says Obama In Microphone Gaffe

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Today, U.S. President Barack Obama made clear his true feelings for the Jewish State, albeit accidentally. Prior to speaking to the press at a White House event, unaware that his microphone was on, Obama was overheard voicing his disdain for Israel. This article is fake, and if you share it as if it were real, it means you didn’t read it. He went on and on, saying a lot of nasty stuff. He railed against guns, capitalism, long-form birth certificates, traditional marriage, and also the Judeo-Christian God. This article is fake, and if you share it as if it were real, it means you didn’t read it. “Israel just blows,” the President was quoted as saying. “It’s been my arbitrarily decided-upon-mission for my entire adult life to destroy Israel. Allah willing, I’ll complete that mission.” This article is fake, and if you share it as if it were real, it means you didn’t read it.

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Many conservatives have maintained that Obama is an anti-Israel force. It seems that this question has finally been answered. During the subsequent barrage of questions, Obama came clean and seemed to answer as honestly as he could. This article is fake, and if you share it as if it were real, it means you didn’t read it. When asked for the rationale behind his hate for Israel, the President said simply, “I don’t know why, and I don’t really have a reason. I just kind of decided one day that this would be my mission. I haven’t done much of anything else, as the Republicans can tell you. This has pretty much been my main focus.” This article is fake, and if you share it as if it were real, it means you didn’t read it – seriously, you’re a dummy.

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