For years Yemen has been experiencing the (currently) worst humanitarian crisis of the 21st century, a country throat punched by war, famine, and pestilence, and much like Ivanka trying to mingle, they too are consistently ignored by global leaders. However, Yemeni diplomats felt a flicker of hope this week after watching Trump’s disastrous attempt at a campaign-relaunch rally over the weekend in Tulsa. Now that Trump has experienced what it feels like to be abandoned and to bomb, Yemenis are hopeful that he will finally come to their aid.
“They’re saying that Trump’s rally bombed” said one Yemeni diplomat. “We know how that feels, so if he needs someone to talk to, we’re still here. I know Trump didn’t really get our sense of sheer abandonment before but damn those empty seats were rough. And people were yawning. For Trump, that’s as bad as being indiscriminately murdered and starved to death for a decade. Maybe now he’ll help us.”
Appealing to Trump’s empathy may seem like a pretty far-fetched plan, but in Yemen’s defense, literally nothing else has worked. Some citizens, however, are less certain. “We saw his disaster relief efforts in Puerto Rico, what’s he going to do here? Throw paper towels at us in a desert?”