Rising Anti-Semitism, Rising Waters; God’s Going Old School on Europe

Paris flooded, 2016 by BikerNormand [CC BY-SA 2.0], via Wikimedia Commons

It’s no secret that anti-Semitism has risen to an all time high over the past few years in Europe with France, Britain, and Germany again becoming the least liveable countries for the visibly or openly Jewish population – and God has had enough.

“Can anyone say, ‘deluge’?”

Once targeted with “Go Back to Palestine” graffiti in the 1930’s, the same narrative applies today, yet in reverse. “Leave Palestine” is the new trend, as a number of Europeans continue in their quest to wipe Jews off the world map as they disguise their new Nazism as anti-Zionist sentiment.

RELATED: European Officials Claim Spike in Anti-Semitism Due to “Reading Chart Upside-Down”

“What are they threatened by? My chosen people – albeit against their will – make up less than 0.2% of the world’s population, or for the mathematically challenged, that’s around 14 million out of 7.4 billion of my anxiety-laden, inherently complaining children who can’t digest lactose. And you still think there’s some kind of conspiracy? That’s it – time for hipster ‘Noa’ to build that sustainable eco-friendly 100% compostable made from recycled materials bamboo ark.”

With severe flooding, and flash floods now plaguing Paris, London, and Dresden, priceless pieces of artwork, radical Islamists, regressive liberals, and right-wing extremists were the first to be evacuated.

In response to the big man upstairs’ actions, the European Union has released a statement. “Look man, sometimes you just have to stay out of it, okay? Like how we generally stay out of most Middle Eastern affairs. Except Israel’s, but that’s mostly because we allow them to participate in Eurovision.”