ISIS’s IT team has been working non-stop to get their recruiting pages back on the net, after a massive uptick of new recruits caused them to crash early Friday. Data shows that the increase in recruitment did not happen the day after the election, but rather closer to the weekend. Experts link the delay with recruits’ initial assumption that the candidate who received the most votes won. This changed when Trump supporter’s explanation of the electoral system began to infiltrate urban ‘filter bubbles’.
However, the election of Trump was bad news to some members of ISIS. Reports indicate that the organization’s communications team will have massive layoffs. A source familiar with the organization told TMB “they used to spend heavily on video production in order to recruit, but with Trump becoming president, it’s utterly unnecessary.”
Trump responded to the events on Twitter at 4:17AM this morning writing, “I still cannot tell you how, but we’re beating ISIS, beating them bigly”, later adding “they don’t even make beheading videos anymore.”