At the annual Fun-Islam Convention in the coastal city of Bushehr, Iranian Supreme Council member Jawafar Rafsanah admitted that Iran’s nuclear program was merely “a joke that simply went too far”. Rafsanah, speaking on condition of anonymity, said that the nuclear program began as an internal joke between (Supreme Leader) Khamenei and President Rafsanjani, who had told the leader “hey,...
Calling it a proud symbol of a heritage worth honoring, ISIS leader Abu Bakr al-Baghdadi staunchly backed South Carolina’s efforts to fly the Confederate battle flag over government buildings and said the Caliphate was considering adopting the flag itself. “The Confederate battle flag stands for racism, slavery, treason, oppression, discrimination. In other words, everything that’s awesome!” al-Baghdadi told The Israeli...
Today, U.S. President Barack Obama made clear his true feelings for the Jewish State, albeit accidentally. Prior to speaking to the press at a White House event, unaware that his microphone was on, Obama was overheard voicing his disdain for Israel. This article is fake, and if you share it as if it were real, it means you didn’t read...
Approximately 10,000 Israelis beating a hasty retreat from Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s nonstop threats to attack Iran’s nuclear facilities have crossed into Turkey, the United Nations refugee agency said Tuesday. “Damn straight I’m a refugee. I woke up at three in the morning just to watch Game 6 of the NBA Finals. Just as LeBron James is driving to the basket, a news...
Concerns are rising among sports commentators as well as Jewish community mavens regarding the loss of the Cleveland Cavaliers at the 2015 NBA finals. Cavaliers coach David Blatt, who had immigrated to Israel in 1981, is pretty much a national hero in his adoptive country and calls himself “a proud Jew, Israeli and Pez dispensers collector”. However, the loss of...
Photo: The Israeli Daily cannot confirm if these were the chairs stolen by IDF soldiers. A complaint was logged with the International Criminal Court today about War Crimes committed by the Israel Defense Force (IDF) against the Israeli population during last summer’s Gaza War. The complaint came as the scale of the theft of chairs and umbrellas from cafes and...
While negotiations between the U.S. and Iran over the latter’s nuclear program near a key deadline, one radical splinter group of former Obama administration officials has taken matters into its own hands, sneaking into Iran to work on improving the country’s nuclear infrastructure. The group, which calls itself “Right to Enrich,” (RTE) broke off from the U.S. government after growing...
STOCKHOLM – At the fifth annual BDS Movement Award Show, the Swedish Academy for Political Hypocrisy, which hosted the event, gave the lifetime achievement award to the long-deserving ultra-orthodox Rabbi Ben Schmuck of Halamish, an orthodox Jewish settlement in the West Bank. The academy noted Schmuck’s many years of ideological leadership and dedication to the BDS cause. Academy chairman Ike A. Meatballsson...
Mossad officials acknowledged Sunday that the future of the Jewish state is in jeopardy after British activist Asghar Bukhari exposed the agency’s long-running practice of stealing the shoes of political opponents. “While I’m not usually one to admit defeat, I would recommend all Israeli Jews start looking for another country to obtain citizenship,” the Mossad official told The Israeli Daily....
After Lifetime television rebuffed Senator John McCain’s demand that the cable network either restore Matlock to their schedule or suffer a brutal military response, the Senator ordered the military to make good on his threat. “I told the guy who answered the phone at the Pentagon that I need them to launch an attack on a cable network in New...
The United Nations Security Council (UNSC) passed a resolution earlier today stating that any and all Israeli military action constitutes war crimes. What separates this resolution from the overwhelming number of resolutions already condemning the Jewish State is that it appears to be all encompassing. “In case anyone hasn’t noticed, we just waste so much of our time singling out...
After months of nuclear negotiations with the United States, Iranian officials admitted they were having a hard time convincing their American counterparts that they have no interest in reaching a deal. “Look, [Secretary of State] John Kerry seems like a really nice guy and we’d hate to hurt his feelings,” said one Iranian Supreme Leader, speaking on the condition of...
An exceptionally horny Israeli aviator on Sunday veered away from his squadron during a wide-scale multinational drill, and flew off with a pack of Italian Air Force pilots to party it up in Rome. “I became a flyboy because no matter what I did, I just couldn’t get laid in high school. Per capita, Israeli aviators have the highest rates...
Single-handedly ending 67 years of statelessness for millions of Palestinians, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan announced Monday that a $615 million palace in Ankara will be devoted exclusively to housing Palestinian refugees. Erdogan’s announcement debunked months of news reports claiming that the building, 30 times the size of the White House, would instead be a lavish Presidential Palace with more...
ANKARA – The world’s only Muslim kinda-democracy held its kinda-democratic election on Sunday. Early results appeared to offer hope to supporters of kinda-democracy worldwide. Glorious Supreme Leader president Recep Tayyip Erdogan’s AKP (party in favor of AK rifles) lost the parliamentary majority it held since 2002, with most of the votes going to the Kurdish HDP (party in favor of HD...
In the wake of his Justice and Development Party‘s humiliating electoral defeat, Turkish President Recep Erdogan lashed out at many of the usual suspects: the New York Times for “being Jews,” the West, and the Kurds for voting. Yet in a surprisingly honest interview with The Israeli Daily, Erdogan explained that he too accepts some of the blame. “Like the...
The Israeli government has long pursued a stance of “nuclear ambiguity,” neither denying nor admitting to possessing stocks of nuclear weapons. However, recently the government has pretty much stopped caring, and is only not telling America about the weapons. According to the transcript of a conversation obtained by The Israeli Daily, India asked Israel: “Soooo, do you guys really...
Belgium, the small North Sea-facing, chocolate eating, beer drinking nation has objected to being lumped in with the ‘world’ in comments by Iraqi Prime Minister, Haider al-Abadi. In an interview with The Israeli Daily, plucky Belgium noted, “I think what Mr al-Abadi meant by “failure on the part of the world”, was what the rest of us call ‘America’. Frankly...
Leaders from throughout the Arab world and Middle East were reminded again this week why it’s a bad idea to let people vote, as Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdogan’s AKP party failed to win a majority, much less cross the 99-percent threshold standard in the region, in Sunday’s parliamentary elections. “I’m so glad I’ll never have to deal with this...
The Islamic State scored a coup today when the former president, formerly known as Jimmy Carter, held a press conference in Syria and pledged allegiance to ISIS. “Ever since people made the mistake of voting me out of office, I just haven’t been all that sold on America,” explained Carter, who now insists on being addressed by his “Islamic name,” Ali...
