Bomb Shelter, Bomb Shells!

With the recent upsurge in rocket fire thanks to Switzerland-by-the-Sea, Israelis living in the South have taken to using their bomb shelters, which has displaced their normal residents.

“This shit is getting ridiculous. There’s almost no where to smoke and have sex with my boyfriend” complained an anonymous 12-year-old girl from Sderot. “It’s really unfair.”
 “Yea, it’s terrible,” complained Mohamed Al-Latif. “I was growing some herbal medicine plants in the local shelter and all the Jews came and smoked it all. Now the only way I can make any money back is to sell milk and cookies, when they get munchies.”

Also hit has been the local under ground Cockroach Fighting matches. “Three of the best have just been stepped on before they could fight.,” said Avi Kennedy, from Beersheva. “I’ve seen a few good roaches in my time, but nothing can survive a 300 pound Russian woman who is running from a rocket. It’s truly a tragedy.”

“We need a permanent solution in the South,” said a spokesman for the Prime Ministers Office. “If the kids have to have sex at home, and the Bedouin can’t sell herbal medicines or the retards have their roach fighting league, what’s the point of having a state? Man, I could really do with some herbal medicine right now.”