Roger Pumper

Journalism has been in Roger Pumper’s blood since he began his first paper route in Kabul, Afghanistan, at the age of seven. After graduating from Cairo’s Al-Azhar University with a Doctorate in Animal Husbandry, Pumper worked as a fact-checker for Brian Williams and Bill O’Reilly. Pumper was awarded a Pulitzer Prize in 2002 for his investigative reporting on Iraq’s WMD program, though the award was later revoked. Pumper currently resides on a goat farm outside Kirachi, Pakistan.

 

North Korean Dictator Praises Former Egyptian President’s Death Sentence

North Korean Dictator Praises Former Egyptian President’s Death Sentence

Noting that there’s “no better way to unite a country than executing its only democratically-elected president,” North Korean leader Kim Jong-un came out in support of former Egyptian President Mohamed Morsi’s death sentence, issued this week by an Egyptian court. “There’s only one way to bring prosperity, growth and a shared vision to a country, and that’s by executing everyone...

DC Bars and Strip Clubs Hit Hard by Saudi King’s Trip Cancellation
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DC Bars and Strip Clubs Hit Hard by Saudi King’s Trip Cancellation

Following Saudi King Salman’s last-minute cancellation of his trip to meet with President Obama, several of DC’s upscale bars, strip clubs, and luxury retail outlets say they may be forced to declare bankruptcy. “I’ve been counting on this visit all year. Hell, half my inventory was ordered with the Saudi royal family in mind,” said one DC jeweler. “It’s like if...

Chickens Blast Obama Administration for Netanyahu Comparison

Chickens Blast Obama Administration for Netanyahu Comparison

Last October, after a senior Obama official referred to Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu as “chickenshit,” the remarks drew a quick and harsh rebuke from chickens worldwide. “Not only is the term used offensively, but on behalf of all chickens I emphatically reject the comparison to Prime Minister Netanyahu,” said Clucker, a 3-year-old Leghorn Chicken living in Montana. “For the...

Following Lauryn Hill’s Concert Cancellation, Israel Agrees to Leave West Bank
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Following Lauryn Hill’s Concert Cancellation, Israel Agrees to Leave West Bank

Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu promised Israel will evacuate its military and civilians from the West Bank and end its blockade on the Gaza Strip Tuesday, a day after hip hop star Lauryn Hill announced the cancellation of a scheduled concert in protest of Israel’s occupation of the Palestinian territories. “As I’ve said repeatedly, withdrawing from the West Bank puts...

Iranian State Media Wins Pulitzer for Gaza War Coverage
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Iranian State Media Wins Pulitzer for Gaza War Coverage

Press TV, Iran’s state-run media arm, was the big winner at the Pulitzer Prize award ceremony, winning multiple honors for its coverage of Israel’s 50-day war with Gaza last summer. The award for investigative reporting went to the network for its account of Israel’s attempt to take down a commercial airplane leaving Gaza City by releasing hundreds of venomous snakes in...

Responding to Iran Criticism, Obama Unleashes Assault on Netanyahu’s Comb-Over

Responding to Iran Criticism, Obama Unleashes Assault on Netanyahu’s Comb-Over

Following a litany of criticism over the proposed framework of an agreement on Iran’s nuclear program, President Obama came out with his strongest rhetoric to date in denunciation of Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, calling his hairstyle “an obvious comb-over unfitting of a world leader.” “Netanyahu is saying I shouldn’t trust the Ayatollahs, but I don’t see them spending 45...

ISIS Bars Jihadists from West Africa Amid Ebola Concerns

ISIS Bars Jihadists from West Africa Amid Ebola Concerns

The Islamic State in Iraq and Syria (ISIS) has issued a ban on jihadists traveling from West African countries, as an increasing number of fighters for the group have expressed concerns regarding the continuing Ebola threat. “Me and a fellow obsessive Koran reader were about to invade this Christian village outside Baghdad and slaughter everyone when the guy just starts coughing,”...

Israeli Government Joins BDS Movement for Kim and Kanye’s Visit
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Israeli Government Joins BDS Movement for Kim and Kanye’s Visit

The BDS movement, which urges artists and consumers to boycott Israel and Israeli products, gained an unlikely supporter, as the Israeli government announced it would be urging rapper Kanye West and his wife, reality television star Kim West, to cancel their upcoming trip to the country in protest of its many human rights violations. “The only way to end the...

Exonerated NYPD Cop Hired by Iranian Security Forces
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Exonerated NYPD Cop Hired by Iranian Security Forces

After learning he will not face criminal charges in the US, the NYPD officer captured on video applying a fatal chokehold to an unarmed man this past summer has been hired by the Iranian Revolutionary Guards, the elite military force tasked with maintaining order and protecting the regime domestically. “We were looking for new recruits who would use deadly force...

Elders of Zion Admit They’re Having Second Thoughts Over Allowing Obama’s Election

Elders of Zion Admit They’re Having Second Thoughts Over Allowing Obama’s Election

Following President Obama’s increasingly hostile rhetoric towards Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu, several members of the Elders of Zion privately told The Israeli Daily that they were having second thoughts about their decision to allow him to be elected to the world’s most powerful office. “We were a little apprehensive about letting a guy with the middle name ‘Hussein’ run...

U.S to Move Embassy to Jerusalem; Cites Tel Aviv Rent Prices

U.S to Move Embassy to Jerusalem; Cites Tel Aviv Rent Prices

In a move long sought by Israeli officials, the U.S. will be moving its embassy to Jerusalem, granting the city de facto recognition as the capital of the Jewish state. The State Department insisted, however, that the decision was not due to a change in policy but simply because the American government could not afford the rent on its beachfront...

Following Herzog’s Lead, Netanyahu Ends Rotation with Sara

Following Herzog’s Lead, Netanyahu Ends Rotation with Sara

A day after the left-wing Zionist Union camp announced it was abandoning its rotation of Isaac Herzog and Tzipi Livni as prime minister in the event of an election victory, Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu announced he and wife Sara Netanyahu would also drop their rotation should the premier’s party, Likud, prevail in the election. “The rotation between Sara and Bibi...

Mel Gibson Appointed to United Nations Post
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Mel Gibson Appointed to United Nations Post

The United Nations has finally found a successor to Richard Falk for the position of Special Rapporteur for the Palestinian territories, naming actor and director Mel Gibson to the post. “When Richard left the position, we never thought we’d be able to fill his shoes,” a UN source explained to The Israeli Daily. “The guy thinks 9/11 was an inside...

Obama Set to Address Knesset on Comptroller Report Criticizing Netanyahus’ Spending

Obama Set to Address Knesset on Comptroller Report Criticizing Netanyahus’ Spending

Following Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu’s speech to Congress blasting the White House for concessions to Iran in nuclear negotiations, President Barack Obama announced Wednesday he would address the Israeli Knesset on the recent comptroller’s report on the Netanyahus’ wasteful use of public funds on personal expenses. Insisting the move was neither personal nor political, Obama said he felt it was...

Abbas, Khamenei Urge Netanyahu Not to Cancel Address to Congress

Abbas, Khamenei Urge Netanyahu Not to Cancel Address to Congress

While a host of Israeli politicians and Jewish leaders have called on Prime Minister Benjamin “Bibi” Netanyahu to cancel his speech to Congress set for this Tuesday, Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas came out in defense of Netanyahu and urged him not to back down in the face widespread criticism. “Who cares what Obama thinks? Bibi, it’s your duty as Israel’s...