Trans Albino Half-Jewish, Half-Muslim Vegan Denied Campus ‘Safe Space’

BERKELEY – A freshman is suing one of America’s most progressive colleges for discrimination after it rejected a request to fund his own ‘TAVJI safe space.’

According to 19-year-old Adam Hussein-Hershkowitz, “contrary to UC Berkeley’s radical leftist reputation, it’s actually a hotbed of virulent anti-TAVJI bigotry” – using an acronym he coined to describe his combined transgenderism, albinism and veganism, as well as his Jewish and Islamic identities (inherited from his mother and Iraqi-born father, respectively).

Speaking to The Mideast Beast, the Beverly Hills native described his futile search for a welcoming safe space since enrolling in the fall: “While they were OK with me being trans, I was kicked out of the Muslim safe space when I dared criticize Hamas’s call to drive Israeli Jews into the sea. And when I tried my luck in the Jewish ‘Chosen Zone,’ I found the stench of chicken soup abominable – they of all people should fight the Animal Holocaust!”

Hussein-Hershkowitz, who hasn’t eaten meat or dairy since his bat mitzvah (he only transitioned from Eve to Adam aged 16), then called Berkeley’s student vegans “transphobic liars” for barring him from their ‘Vegalutionary’ safe shed: “Their claim that the pharmaceutical company that makes the Depo-Testosterone I inject daily is guilty of animal testing is patently false, exposing their despicable cisgender supremacist agenda.”

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Caption: A poster hanging in UC Berkeley’s student vegan safe space (graphic by Ben Isacat via Flickr http://bit.ly/1YIvLLn)

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Furthermore, Hussein-Hershkowitz claims that members of UC Berkeley’s disabled safe space refused to recognize his mild form of albinism as a genuine disability, with one black paraplegic allegedly yelling: “STFU you overindulged rich whitey – try fleeing trigger-happy racist police in a banged-up wheelchair!” And while the college’s trans community spokesperson told TMB that “we welcomed Adam with open arms,” Hussein-Hershkowitz accused the group of blatant anti-Semitism when, upon entering its ‘Transecure’ room, a mural of Caitlyn Jenner – not trailblazing Israeli singer Dana International – greeted him.

“And then, when I relayed my harrowing experiences to the university chancellor and requested funds for a dedicated safe space of my own, he callously replied, ‘cry me a TAVJI river,’” said a sobbing Hussein-Hershkowitz. “Clearly it’s not me, but UC Berkeley, that has the problem. But as emotionally brutalized as I feel, I know that I’m not alone: Whether or not my lawsuit is successful, my fledging liberation movement has at least three members in the U.S., and over eight overseas. Together, we, the oppressed TAVJI masses of the world, will one day overcome this tyrannical conspiracy of barbaric un-PC insensitivity.”