Following the most recent beheading of a colleague, graphic design graduate Mark Davis began to regret taking the internship with Al-Hayat media, which he had applied to during his final semester.
“The job market is really tight for recent grads, you know? So I saw the opportunity with ISIS and I had to jump on it,” said Davis in an exclusive interview with The Mideast Beast. “I won’t lie, I got really great experience working in post-production, so I can’t say I regret that, but it’s not the friendliest work environment.”
Apart from the regular beatings and beheadings, Davis cited the “stuck up” office culture as the worst part about it. “I always come to the office well-dressed and groomed. I’m partial to the five o’clock shadow look, but they insist on a full beard. Not to mention that they’ve replaced casual Fridays with ‘orange jumpsuit Fridays,’ which is a bit unnerving to say the least. And forget about Happy Hour after work.”
Davis continued, “I’m considering a full-time position with Hezbollah, but they’re only offering a crappy stipend and they don’t cover travel expenses, which is bullshit because I know they recently got a huge funding source.” Asked whether he would consider applying for a job with Donald Trump’s incoming adminstration, Davis shot back, “Are you fucking kidding me? I still have some principles.”